The most deeply personal and jarring of all the tracks on "We're All We Have," “Too Much Beauty” takes its inspiration from a perfect storm of several disparate events.
One, the end of the film “American Beauty” where Lester says, “there’s so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I’m seeing it all at once, and it’s too much. My heart fills up like a balloon that’s about to burst.”
This lead to an examination of one's own anxieties and others who carry around pain but are trying desperately to hide it. It’s sometimes impossible to see the beauty in a singular moment because everything feels so fleeting. Like it’s all going to vanish like smoke.
Two, the song's narrative is largely based on a real life tragic suicide of a boy close to the band which sent shockwaves through their community.
This then lead to the societal debate following the suicides of Chris Cornell and Chester Bennington and wow we still don’t – or can’t – grasp the insidiousness of mental illness. The kind that is silent and unseen and, at its worst, leads to suicide. And this idea that after someone has taken their life, people are shocked that they didn’t see the signs. But see, most people who fall that deep in are - by and large - doing everything they can to disappear and not raise red flags. And it’s not that they don’t see the joy and beauty in the world. It’s just too much to bear. Like Lester says in “American Beauty,” too much to take inside.
The linear story in “Too Much Beauty” follows a boy from living a tormented life to passing over to the other side where he’s betting his life, literally, on being able to finally be free and be who he really is. But it’s all an illusion. He speaks to those who will mourn him while he’s still living (“You’ll remember my smile, and that note I wrote to you…you’ll get a lot of questions, you’ll say you thought you knew”). He speaks from the other side to those who mourn him at his wake (“now all the eyes are on me…above me, thoughts and prayers…and songs of comfort and mercy, ring hallow through the air”).
lyrics
TOO MUCH BEAUTY
I shuffle through the crowded halls, looks like I’m lost in a dream.
No one sees me at all, but not everything’s what it seems.
Some days I’m right here, and on other days I’m gone.
I don’t know where it is I go, or how I manage to hold on.
I’m counting numbers in my head, my OCD goes 1, 2, 3.
And no matter how hard I try some things can’t be unseen.
And it’s not that I don’t see all this joy and beauty,
But it’s just too much to bear…it all seems so fleeting.
ch. Well, this world has way too much beauty, I can’t take it all inside.
Some of us feel too much, so we lie
And all the while I just smile and say that it's all right.
Well, the hours turn into days, and the nights feel like years.
The carousel keeps on spinning, it’s all dread and fear.
You’ll remember my smile, and that note I wrote for you.
You’ll get a lot of questions, and you’ll say you thought you knew.
ch.
Now all the eyes are on me, above me, thoughts and prayers
And songs of comfort and mercy ring hollow through the air.
Maybe now you’ll understand, I couldn’t go on living a lie
Maybe now I can be who I am…on the other side.
Well, the world had way too much beauty, just too much to take inside
But no one can hurt me now…
I keep telling myself, it’s gonna be all right.
Well, the world had way too much beauty, I thought this was paradise
But it’s all an illusion to me now…
So, I keep telling myself, it’s gonna be all right.
Raj Makwana: All Guitars
Bill See: Vocals, Harmonica
Dave Smerdzinski: Drums, Percussion
Steve Soto: Bass
Produced by Divine Weeks
Recorded & Mixed at Grandma’s Warehouse Studio, Echo Park, CA June 2 - October 1, 2018
Engineered by Andrew Bush
Mastered at The SoundLab
Named one of the 15 best unsigned bands by the L.A. Times, Divine Weeks were signed to Dream Syndicate's Steve Wynn's Down
There label releasing debut "Through & Through" in '87. In '91 they released "Never Get Used To It." After a lengthy hiatus, singer Bill See's memoir "33 Days" was the catalyst to reforming & releasing "See Those Landing Lights" & the politically charged "We're All We Have"...more
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